(These first sections were written approximately between 6 PM and 7 PM:)
I have to pull myself together and finally/at last continue to write on lukasgirtanner.com (respectively under the new domain lukasgirtanner.info). I am aware that my website lukasgirtanner.com has been inaccessible for several months. I was unable to look after this issue. The only thing that I did was to check whether the database still exists and it still exists, so I was reassured. In the next days, I will have to find out how to reactivate my website lukasgirtanner.com, possibly under the new domain lukasgirtanner.info (which I already own). I will also have to find out how I can change the title of this blog here so that the current year (2013) is included too. But as soon as my main website is online again, I will continue to write my blog there. Very important will be that I re-focus on mathematics. The other "supernatural stuff" and my biography (which I still will have to write) might have to be separated as much as possible from it.
I also have to be enormously grateful for the huge amount of governmental money (I will have to check how much it exactly is, it is around 3500 Swiss francs every month, all in all, but one has to take into account that living costs are also high here) keeps coming/rolling in every month because of my disability pension. Because of this money, I can stay at my mother's home because I can pay her the rent. (The diagnosis onto which the disability allowance is based is "paranoid schizophrenia", but I am unsure if the term "schizophrenia" really applies to me respectively whether such terms such be applied at all to any person. The only fact is that I have heard voices and I still hear them occasionally, but why should this automatically mean that one is abnormal in some distinct or clearly definable way? But still, I am really grateful for the money (disability allowance/benefit) that I receive. (The text in the parentheses was added between 19:36h and 19:41h.))
I am also aware that I probably gave the impression of being quite an unreliable person because I didn't immediately hurry to put my website lukasgirtanner.com back on the Internet after it went offline. Furthermore, I also didn't hurry to make at least one explanatory statement here why my website was offline. The reason for that was that I was simply too much depressed and also in some way overwhelmed by the insight how much my worldview has changed in the last years, so I didn't want to make a mistake by writing again something that I later on would regret or at least no longer advocate.
Also a possibility might be to change the name of "babieslearnbetter" to "lukasgirtannersblog" or "blogoflukasgirtanner" or simply "lukasgirtanner". Unless I am mistaken, it is (or it has now become) possible to retrospectively change the subdomain (what is written to the left of the actual domain name "blogger.com").
Also a reason why I didn't restore the website lukasgirtanner.com immediately was that I felt quite alone (and demotivated) because I never received any spontaneous e-mail so far about my website and also the Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/lukasgirtannercom that I founded in March 2012 still has not any followers/"likes" yet (except my own "like"). So, I was not sure whether respectively to what extent people read what I write and also if what I have written makes at least some sense to the readers. (The last sentence in this section here and two words in the first sentence were added later in the evening, between around 22:00h and 22:03h.)
I am also looking forward for the new Lego Mindstorms robots (Lego Mindstorms Education EV3) that will soon be available. I will probably buy one set and try to do robotics with it.
Additional note (19:04h): I just changed the name/title of this blog here and added "and July 2013" at the title's ending (after I found out how to do it).
Additional note (19:06h): My mother has just realized that I have continued writing on my blog and she is not delighted at all. For a couple of minutes, she was ranting at me, and now, she is upstairs cooking dinner. She would prefer if I focused more on continuing my university studies which I only do half-heartedly (she would prefer that I do it full-heartedly). At the moment, it is also unclear which studies I should exactly follow: Either, I try to pass the exam that I failed in June 2012 a second time, or I change my major subject to educational science and/or I begin studies at a distance university, then probably educational science.
But still, what I would really like to do is an education that is practically oriented on how to teach best the subjects of computer science and electrical engineering (and possibly mathematics) to children. But such an education (academic training) unfortunately is not available, at least not in Europe let alone in the German-speaking part of Europe (where university fees are also low enough to be affordable). But now, I again wrote about this university stuff, I should write more about what really interests me (although my mother wants me to focus on a university education exclusively, so I will have to make a compromise).
Additional note (19:21h - 19:28h): My heart is no aching a little bit and I have a strange feeling in my head, as if I had something like a mini-stroke. This feeling began after my mother began to scold me. This strange feeling at the moment in my head (I hope that it will subside) just shows in what a frail state my health really is. (The reason why this strange feeling in my heart and head began was also that I had not drunken enough water, so my heart was more prone to reacting like that.) By the way, I have also become heavily overweight in the last months, unfortunately, I weigh 94 kilograms (207 pounds/lb) at the moment. I will have to think how I can lose weight in the future. My mother has urged me that I attend nutrition counseling and I will do that. The most effective way of losing weight is probably just to eat a lot less and remain constantly a little bit hungry. Unfortunately, I was not disciplined enough in the past, so I always overate. This is also in some way a sign of a weakness of character from which I unfortunately suffer.
19:28h - 19:30h: But I am grateful that I am at least still able to write in English, this is no a matter of course, especially after such a long break. Initially, I was unsure if I would be really able to write in English in the way I was still able in 2006 and 2010, but it seems to be in good working order.
19:33h - 19:35h: I just realized that I had written a wrong title for today's blog entry, it was "2013-07-13" instead of "2013-07-29" in the beginning, I don't know why it happened, I have corrected it now.
21:07h - 21:11h: I just moved this blog here from the old/previous address http://www.babieslearnbetter.blogspot.com to this new address here, http://www.lukasgirtannersblog.blogspot.com. It was about high time. Actually, I wanted to move to "lukasgirtanner.blogspot.com", but this address was already occupied (by another blog of mine). I might move this blog here again, switch with the other "lukasgirtanner", but this has time. Yes, I will probably move/switch the two blogs because "...blog.blogspot" on my main blog looks a little bit awkward. (And "babieslearnbetter" should really by reserved for educational issues and not my personal blog.)
21:23h - 21:25h: I now switched the two blog URLs/addresses. The main blog (this blog here) (although, actually, my main blog would be under lukasgirtanner.com, but I will have to bring this website online first) has now the address lukasgirtanner.blogspot.com, while the previous address (that was never used) lukasgirtannersblog.blogspot.com is now just reserved as a blog subdomain, but without any entries/pages.
21:47h - 21:54h: I have now copy-pasted text that I found at https://www.facebook.com/lukasgirtannercom onto the page babieslearnbetter.blogspot.com, this seems to make sense especially as long as the page lukasgirtanner.com (respectively hopefully lukasgirtanner.info) is still offline. I have also realized that the page https://www.facebook.com/lukasgirtannercom is not among the search results for "lukas girtanner facebook", probably because lukasgirtannercom is written in one single word and it is not recognized/connected as a "lukas girtanner" topic. Maybe I will try "lukas-girtanner-info" when I open the new community page for the .info-website.
Ich muss mich jetzt zusammenreissen und endlich wieder an meiner Webseite lukasgirtanner.com weiterschreiben (bzw. unter meiner neuen Domain lukasgirtanner.info). Das einzige, was ich bislang tat, war, zu überprüfen, ob die MySQL-Datenbank, welche das Mediawiki unter lukasgirtanner.com hostet, immer noch existiert und die Datenbank existiert immer noch, zum Glück. Ich muss dann auch noch herausfinden, wie ich diesen Titel "Lukas Girtanner's blog of 2011 - 2012" ändern kann. Ich möchte mich auch sehr für das viele Geld bedanken, welches ich jeden Monat von der Invalidenversicherung erhalte, ungefähr 3500 Franken, die genaue Summe müsste ich nochmals nachschauen bzw. die genaue Summer schreibe ich hier auch nicht hin, auch wenn ich sie weiss.
What I have been doing all these days (during several months):
- taking medication every day (I partially switched to Abilify, so I am taking Zyprexa and Abilify at the moment)
- browsing websites, especially the websites of newspapers (in German and English) in order to understand the world better
- lying in bed a lot also during daytime (too much, this has to change again)
- thinking a lot how to (re)start my website and what to write there
I am also aware that I probably gave the impression of being quite an unreliable person because I didn't immediately hurry to put my website lukasgirtanner.com back on the Internet after it went offline. Furthermore, I also didn't hurry to make at least one explanatory statement here why my website was offline. The reason for that was that I was simply too much depressed and also in some way overwhelmed by the insight how much my worldview has changed in the last years, so I didn't want to make a mistake by writing again something that I later on would regret or at least no longer advocate.
Also a possibility might be to change the name of "babieslearnbetter" to "lukasgirtannersblog" or "blogoflukasgirtanner" or simply "lukasgirtanner". Unless I am mistaken, it is (or it has now become) possible to retrospectively change the subdomain (what is written to the left of the actual domain name "blogger.com").
Also a reason why I didn't restore the website lukasgirtanner.com immediately was that I felt quite alone (and demotivated) because I never received any spontaneous e-mail so far about my website and also the Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/lukasgirtannercom that I founded in March 2012 still has not any followers/"likes" yet (except my own "like"). So, I was not sure whether respectively to what extent people read what I write and also if what I have written makes at least some sense to the readers. (The last sentence in this section here and two words in the first sentence were added later in the evening, between around 22:00h and 22:03h.)
I am also looking forward for the new Lego Mindstorms robots (Lego Mindstorms Education EV3) that will soon be available. I will probably buy one set and try to do robotics with it.
Additional note (19:04h): I just changed the name/title of this blog here and added "and July 2013" at the title's ending (after I found out how to do it).
Additional note (19:06h): My mother has just realized that I have continued writing on my blog and she is not delighted at all. For a couple of minutes, she was ranting at me, and now, she is upstairs cooking dinner. She would prefer if I focused more on continuing my university studies which I only do half-heartedly (she would prefer that I do it full-heartedly). At the moment, it is also unclear which studies I should exactly follow: Either, I try to pass the exam that I failed in June 2012 a second time, or I change my major subject to educational science and/or I begin studies at a distance university, then probably educational science.
But still, what I would really like to do is an education that is practically oriented on how to teach best the subjects of computer science and electrical engineering (and possibly mathematics) to children. But such an education (academic training) unfortunately is not available, at least not in Europe let alone in the German-speaking part of Europe (where university fees are also low enough to be affordable). But now, I again wrote about this university stuff, I should write more about what really interests me (although my mother wants me to focus on a university education exclusively, so I will have to make a compromise).
Additional note (19:21h - 19:28h): My heart is no aching a little bit and I have a strange feeling in my head, as if I had something like a mini-stroke. This feeling began after my mother began to scold me. This strange feeling at the moment in my head (I hope that it will subside) just shows in what a frail state my health really is. (The reason why this strange feeling in my heart and head began was also that I had not drunken enough water, so my heart was more prone to reacting like that.) By the way, I have also become heavily overweight in the last months, unfortunately, I weigh 94 kilograms (207 pounds/lb) at the moment. I will have to think how I can lose weight in the future. My mother has urged me that I attend nutrition counseling and I will do that. The most effective way of losing weight is probably just to eat a lot less and remain constantly a little bit hungry. Unfortunately, I was not disciplined enough in the past, so I always overate. This is also in some way a sign of a weakness of character from which I unfortunately suffer.
19:28h - 19:30h: But I am grateful that I am at least still able to write in English, this is no a matter of course, especially after such a long break. Initially, I was unsure if I would be really able to write in English in the way I was still able in 2006 and 2010, but it seems to be in good working order.
19:33h - 19:35h: I just realized that I had written a wrong title for today's blog entry, it was "2013-07-13" instead of "2013-07-29" in the beginning, I don't know why it happened, I have corrected it now.
21:07h - 21:11h: I just moved this blog here from the old/previous address http://www.babieslearnbetter.blogspot.com to this new address here, http://www.lukasgirtannersblog.blogspot.com. It was about high time. Actually, I wanted to move to "lukasgirtanner.blogspot.com", but this address was already occupied (by another blog of mine). I might move this blog here again, switch with the other "lukasgirtanner", but this has time. Yes, I will probably move/switch the two blogs because "...blog.blogspot" on my main blog looks a little bit awkward. (And "babieslearnbetter" should really by reserved for educational issues and not my personal blog.)
21:23h - 21:25h: I now switched the two blog URLs/addresses. The main blog (this blog here) (although, actually, my main blog would be under lukasgirtanner.com, but I will have to bring this website online first) has now the address lukasgirtanner.blogspot.com, while the previous address (that was never used) lukasgirtannersblog.blogspot.com is now just reserved as a blog subdomain, but without any entries/pages.
21:47h - 21:54h: I have now copy-pasted text that I found at https://www.facebook.com/lukasgirtannercom onto the page babieslearnbetter.blogspot.com, this seems to make sense especially as long as the page lukasgirtanner.com (respectively hopefully lukasgirtanner.info) is still offline. I have also realized that the page https://www.facebook.com/lukasgirtannercom is not among the search results for "lukas girtanner facebook", probably because lukasgirtannercom is written in one single word and it is not recognized/connected as a "lukas girtanner" topic. Maybe I will try "lukas-girtanner-info" when I open the new community page for the .info-website.
22:10h: What is really strange in some way is that I never (or at least not fully) read through what I wrote myself, especially not on http://www.lukasgirtanner.blogspot.com.
(Below follows the shortened version in German, only a small part (the beginning, actually) from the text above is translated respectively I began writing in German but switched to English afterwards, not writing on the German version anymore:)
(Below follows the shortened version in German, only a small part (the beginning, actually) from the text above is translated respectively I began writing in German but switched to English afterwards, not writing on the German version anymore:)
Ich muss mich jetzt zusammenreissen und endlich wieder an meiner Webseite lukasgirtanner.com weiterschreiben (bzw. unter meiner neuen Domain lukasgirtanner.info). Das einzige, was ich bislang tat, war, zu überprüfen, ob die MySQL-Datenbank, welche das Mediawiki unter lukasgirtanner.com hostet, immer noch existiert und die Datenbank existiert immer noch, zum Glück. Ich muss dann auch noch herausfinden, wie ich diesen Titel "Lukas Girtanner's blog of 2011 - 2012" ändern kann. Ich möchte mich auch sehr für das viele Geld bedanken, welches ich jeden Monat von der Invalidenversicherung erhalte, ungefähr 3500 Franken, die genaue Summe müsste ich nochmals nachschauen bzw. die genaue Summer schreibe ich hier auch nicht hin, auch wenn ich sie weiss.
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